First Day of Work

Chapter 4: My Forties

I celebrated my 40th birthday with a bang. My (soon to be ex) husband Jae took care of all of the details, right down to my favorite cake, which was the same as our wedding cake, a carrot cake with cream cheese icing, DJ, invitations, drinks, catering, dance floor by the pool, pool torches, etc. Looking back, that year was the beginning of the end for our marriage. In Jan of 2008, during a screaming match, I told Jae that he had a decision to make, 'you need to decide what you want, if you want to stay or go'. It took him two more years, but he ultimately made the decision to go. That was Feb 5, 2010, 5:00 am, he woke me up to tell me.

So here it is, March 29, 2010, my first day of work in Cambridge, MA. Just this week-end Jae helped me bring up my things I needed for temporary living. Funny that I considered the wine humidifier and all the wines as essential...., but I forgot to pack my work shoes, which Jae will overnight to me tomorrow. The house is finally ready to be put on the market. I am here in MA with the girls and Jae is in PA, try to sell our 'primary marital residence', as the lawyers call it.

I have a blank slate....what will I write....

March 29, 2010

Woke up as usual, at 5:30 am to the most regular alarm clock I have had in the last 5 years, Hanna, my 5 year old daughter. Hanna is having fun exploring all 1000 square feet of my new apartment in downtown Boston, actually the area is The West End. This morning she woke me and Ayden up by turning on the garbage disposal with no running water.

We showered together and she helped me pick out what I would wear to my first day at Millennium. I was having a good morning, I looked good and I felt good and I was excited for my first day at work. My first day to work, actually for 3 months. I had time to prepare breakfast for both girls, eggs and waffles with a side of chocolate milk, before my short commute to Cambridge.

It was raining pretty hard, so I borrowed Ayden's umbrella and headed for the lobby, as I walked out the front door and tried to expand the umbrella, the top popped right off the pole. I laughed and thought, oh well, I'll drop into the first little store on the way. So I enjoyed the slightly cool spring rain on my face for my two block walk to the T, Boston's version of the subway. I had another 4 blocks to walk once I arrived at Central Square in Cambridge. I thought to myself, the rain will be good for my complexion. Of course there were the orientation photos, for security badges and for posting on the corporate website. There is a reason those photos are always so bad.

Orientation was long, but exciting, my good mood lasting even through the most droll of presentations. In reality, I am just grateful to be here. Grateful for the opportunity that this job offer presented. My blank slate. New job, new town, new marital status, new friends, new me, old me, re-aquainting with an old friend lost to marriage. Happy to be alone, not happy to be alone. Blank slate.

My commute home was even more wet than the commute in. I had water dripping from my hair as I entered Central Square station. The T was delayed as it crossed the Cambridge Ave Bridge. Sitting in my seat, with water dripping into my lap, I looked up and out of the window at the gray Boston skyline and smiled. I noticed a group of friends heading into Boston for the evening, chatting and laughing. I looked out of the window at the Charles River and watch the Harvard Crew Team rowing down the river. Such a romantic sight. I smiled again and thought...

This is Mine, better start writing on that Blank Slate.